There was this stand in the middle of a shopping mall right and I didn’t quite understand what it was. Now I know it was one of the MOHA Gay Recruitment pop-up stand. My girl friend at the time Laura actually suggested I go.
Now I need to set the scene – I was het all the way. Played rugby, sought out the worst beer possible and drunk it past its used by date. Hell I even bashed Laura at least once a day to keep up appearances. Straight as a straight line could be me.
I remember it clearly. We were all laughing, the electro shock gay recruitment strategy didn’t work. They even bought in the spinning mirror ball, strobe light and Donna Summer booster pack and it didn’t do a thing. I knew I couldn’t change – straight as a door knob me.
And then it happened. It took just one photo of Nick Jonas and I was set for my life. My arms flew into the air with a huge big gay cry. My hand went limp and the sibilance began – ‘girl’ I said to Laura ‘someone’s got to take you shopping and that body wave has got to go’.
Epilogue: actually now Laura and I are best of friends. She didn’t take too long to adjust from girl friend to fag hag. Probably because she looks so much better and her multiple boy friend are HOT HOT HOT.